Don't Give Up

The jokes are plentiful ...

husband/wife, daughter-in-law/mother-in-law, in-laws in general.

I don't like the jokes.

I don't like the generalizations.

But perhaps you have seen your real life reflected in the jokes.

I have to say that I did not always have the best relationship with my MIL.

And I get it ... I really do.

I was so different.

Can you imagine a girl who had never hunted?

...had never even shot a gun?

...was not versed in camping?

and then wore a skirt for ALL activities?

Then she adopted strange dietary habits!

It just didn't make sense.

The chasm was wide.

And add to that that her son had changed.

After nearly 20 years, the suppositions became comical.

She thought that he made me walk everywhere.

She thought that I made him eat healthy.

In truth, I was the one who would prefer to walk anywhere

and he was the discipline I needed to properly care for my body with my meals.

We learned to get along.

And in the last days, I may have known more about her than almost anyone.

I became her companion and nurse.

Not only that, but I was changed.

I realized that there were things that I could change to be more relatable.

Jewelry and makeup and purses were important to her.

And they were not to me.

But in order to minister, I remembered to put a little blush on in the morning,

I learned to accessorize (and maybe even like it a bit),

I tried to vary my handbags.

It was my way of "becoming all things to all people."

All this to say,

I don't know what difficult relationship you face,

but there is hope.

Cling to a Biblical Principle.

For me it was our reason for moving to Oregon and helped in the hard days.

"If any will not care for his own, he is worse than an infidel."

So keep praying

and do what you can to keep the peace.

The resolution may be right around the corner.

When the Real "You" Comes Out

 We often use an example of a teabag.

You may not know what is in the tea bag UNTIL it is put in hot water.

It is then that the tea, the flavor, seeps out.

I must say that I was faced with that situation this summer.

When the heat turned up,

when things got busy,

when there were more demands on my time,

I could see what was inside.

Unfortunately,

Some days, I most clearly saw my own selfishness.

Oh, how I wanted a morning to myself.

Oh, how I missed one shopping trip a week.

There were easier ways of fulfilling the tasks presented.

Why couldn't things be done MY way?

In seeing my selfishness,

I could work on it.

I could serve as Christ wanted me to serve.

I could remember that one day I might need daily help.

One day, I might be asking for help in ways that could be simplified.

I could remember that life is not all about ME.

Jesus was a servant - He served with humility.

I needed to follow suit.

What are the pressures of life showing you today?

Instead of blame-shifting,

why not work on you?

Why not let something sweet come out of your teabag?

Fall Picnic

 We are in the rainy season here in the Wilamette Valley.

It is a strange occurrence to most people.

After 5 months with no rain (or possibly drizzle on 2-3 days),
we will literally have rain every day until April.

It won't be all day, every day ... 

but at some point each day,

it will rain!

We planned a picnic for this past Saturday.

Some of the attendees were concerned ... and rightly so,

the weather would be horrible!

We did rent a pavilion for the party

and we prayed.

The weather prediction was Rain, Rain, Rain!

God gave us a damp October day - 

but only a few sprinkles during the picnic

and even some sun breaks.

The children were able to play on the availble equipment,

the fire pit was usable for heat and s'mores,

the leaves were beautiful against the often grey skies.

I enjoyed cooking for a crowd again.

I took shredded Italian pork, sloppy joes, baked beans,

cuties, grapes, and deviled eggs.

There were also lots of soups.

And this week ...

Sunday - leftover baked beans / green beans / salad

Monday - shepherd's pie (substitute lentils for ground meat)

Tuesday - mashed avocado taco (mash avocado with white beans and put in corn tortilla)

Wednesday - breakfast for dinner

Thursday - Crockpot White Bean Soup

Friday - Fast Food Fix (probably fish and french fries)

Time Away

 On this Thankful Thursday,

I am thankful for time away at the beginning of October.

For the past year,

while we could have gone away,

we felt a responsibility to be near in case we were needed.

 

We enjoyed day trips to the coast a few times,

a trip to the Tillamook cheese factory in May,

and some shopping trips in neighboring towns.

But between Covid shutdowns and responsibilities,

we had not had a vacation.

At the beginning of October,

we took a little getaway to see 2 well-known West Coast sites.

We went to Northern California to see the Redwoods,

and then traveled to see Crater Lake here in Oregon.

We first went to Mystery of Trees - highly "touristy,"

but the suspension bridges through the trees was fun

and there was a gondola ride through the trees as well.
Both were a little bit of a challenge as far as a fear of heights.

We also just hiked through the national forest on a rainy afternoon.

The great thing was - the forest was pretty dense and we stayed mostly dry.

We are always drawn to the coast.

The first picture is the California coast on a stormy afternoon.

And a pier and a lighthouse in Crescent City, CA.

We also enjoyed Chick Fil A for the first time since leaving NC 2 1/2 years ago.
There are sadly only 7 in Oregon and the nearest is right outside of Portland
which we don't like to visit.

And Crater Lake was just beautiful.

When we left home, we thought we would be visiting in snow and icy rain,

but just look at the skies.

We had talked of going to the Redwoods when we lived in Washington,

but just never had.

Come April or May, it is likely that we will not be back to this area of the West,

so we wanted to take it in before we move again.

I am thankful because we had the time to take the trip.

I am thankful because we had the resources to make the trip.

I am thankful because the weather was cool and comfortable (and only a little rain one day).

I am thankful because our car developed an issue on the trip but never left us stranded.

I am thankful because God created such magnificent beauty.

I am thankful because I have someone to share my adventures with.

Clean It Up

Back to Woman's Work Wednesday ... 

Part of our responsibilities of my MIL's estate
was to prepare her "home" to be donated.
We rented a steam cleaner to clean the carpets
and while we had the cleaner, I asked hubby to spot clean a few stains in our home.
The spots he cleaned showed us just how dirty the carpets were.
The carpet throughout the whole house really needed doing.
We are not sure that the cleaners before we moved in put a lot of effort into the process.

Some simple math led me to believe that I could buy a small machine
to clean my carpets and then I could sell it for half the price when we move
and make out better than renting one again.
I could take my time and I could do it more than once.

So last week I began the process.
I finished 2 rooms (the living room and bonus room).
Monday, I finished the dining room.
Yesterday, I completed the guest room.
Now I just have the Master Bedroom for next week.
I will probably repeat the process upon completion,
because I was actually still not getting clean rinse water after completing the first round.

I love the feeling of "knowing" that my house is really clean.
It is more than just the superficial.
It is a "breath easier" feeling.

What are you working on specifically this week?

Do you have a goal project?

I have also been working on running again.
It is actually going fairly well. 
I am no longer timing myself per se.
I am not trying to do a 10-minute mile.
I am interval running 2-3 times a week.
I have read that interval exercise is actually better than steady running.
It keeps the heart working and recovering over and over again.
I run for 2 minutes, I walk for 2 minutes, and I repeat it 6-8 times.
You know what?
it is getting more enjoyable (most days).
And some days, I actually move fast enough that hubby can get some cardio value from it.
All part of that effort to take care of my health.
And this time of year, who can't enjoy the fall leaves, the cooler temperatures, and the fall decorations?

He Knows

Psalm 139:4-6

For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, thou knowest it altogether.

Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it.

This year has been full of twists, turns, surprises.

Some events have been pleasant.

Some events have been unwelcome.

There are years that string together in difficulty.

There are other years of great ease and enjoyment.

Our service in Oregon began as an unknown.

How long?

How would it end?

What would be required?

That chapter is coming to a close.

The Author of that chapter knew how long.

He knew the end.

He knew what would be required.

He knew what I needed to learn in the past 3 years.

He knew of skills I needed to practice.

He knew relationships that could be healed.

He knew of people I could help.
He knew the people that would change me.

He knew my reactions, both good and bad.

The move to Oregon came with excitement and questions,

but it was all known to our loving God.

And now we face another "Adventure."

Our primary "mission" was completed in August.

In every move in the past, our destination was dictated ...

by job to Washington,

by pursuit of education to North Carolina,

by family duty to Oregon.

But now ...

a wide-open country.
Where is the next place of service

There is now the innate desire to fret, to worry, to doubt

when God wants me to trust, to have faith, to walk by faith.

He knows.

He knows the timing.

He knows the desires of my heart.

He knows the needs of my life.

Perhaps there are pressures and unknowns around you today.

Remember that He knows.

He is before you.

He knows your concerns.

Leave the cares with Him today!

Almost A Year?

 Dear Reader,

Has it really been almost a year?

I'm afraid it has.

It has been a busy year - 

busy with new activities, new responsibilities,

new cares, new demands,

new experiences and learning.

Perhaps the biggest thoughts of the year have been on the temporal nature of life.

You know that hubby's mom was diagnosed with cancer.

A woman my age has been battling cancer in our church.

Our former pastor's wife, just slightly younger than I, was called home to heaven after a battle with cancer.

Just this week, I heard of a pastor, again my age, who died in his sleep.

There are just no guarantees in this life.

Hubby's mom finished her battle in August.

While her doctor's appointments ended in January of this year,

there were more responsibilities in visiting and doing excess chores and errands.

In July, we assumed full care as she became home-bound.

There was a lot more running, two visits a day, shopping, and in-home nursing visits.

There was a learning of new nursing skills and jargon.

God was gracious to her and to us. 

Her time with a lack of independence was relatively short - 

really only 1 1/2 months.

We prayed that God would allow us to be with her when she passed.

We almost didn't go that night.

I was tired and just worn out.

I had been over 2 times already that day.

But, we went ...

And she was in the middle of her final pain attack.

We were able to administer medication and pray and sing until the medication kicked in.

She never really resumed alertness but seemed to respond slightly in her last hours to our words and stories.

She passed the next evening.

Again, God's grace - only a short time where she was not truly conscious or alert.

And God gave me a new awareness of the burden of caregiving that many people shoulder for many, many years.

As hubby's last parent was fighting cancer,

as a wife, I couldn't help but think of his health, of our health.

In human terms, both of his parents died young.

Of course, life and death are in God's hands.

The "healthiest" person can die young.

The most "unhealthy" person can exceed 100 years.

But I do feel a responsibility for our health.

Was I doing all that I could for our health and well-being?

After much reading,

we began pursuing a more plant-based diet.

Many bleak diagnoses have been reversed with a change in diet.

This was not an easy task.

It is not just eating vegetables.

You have to find the protein.

You have to find the right balance.

You have to find enough calories.

You have to pay attention to vitamins.

Research and new recipes again ...

Couldn't I just leave well enough alone when it came to diets?

It has been a new challenge, but one that has yielded some good changes in our health.

No, we have not kicked meat to the curb entirely.

I still embrace balance😉

But it plays a little less of a part in the meal planning,

it is a much smaller portion on the plate,

and it forces me to focus on vegetables and whole grains and beans and seeds.

This week - 

Sunday - Rustic Winter Vegetable Soup with polenta

Monday - Teriyaki Salmon, Roasted Brocolli, Brown rice 

Tuesday - Garlic White Bean Soup and Biscuits

Wednesday - Breakfast for supper (usually eggs, avocado, and smoothie)

Thursday - Twice Baked Veggie Stuffed Potato and Grilled Chicken 

Friday - Fast Food Fix (This is the night we satisfy our french fry cravings with an easy meal that includes baked french fries) - did I mention I still embrace balance?

The Absence of Pride in the Christmas Story

 I mentioned that I have enjoyed meditating on the Christmas story a verse or two at a time.

I have noted through the past 3 weeks the incredible humility throughout the story.

Bethlehem ... A small town often looked down upon

Mary ... Acknowledging her own lack of worthiness

God in flesh as an infant

The shame placed on Joseph and Mary which they faced their whole life

Joseph's humble submission to God's plan

The humility of the wise man before the child, Jesus

The humble stable

The lowly shepherds as first guests

God chose humble characters.

He honors humility.

He lived humility before us in the person of Christ (Philippians 2)

The "perfect," family Christmas pictures are pouring in on Christmas cards.

The internet is filled with beautiful homes decorated for the holidays.

There are tables decked with glorious, festive meals.

It can be easy to feel a need to compete,

Or a need to promote ones self,

Or feelings of unworthiness.

When you feel like you are lacking,

When you feel the desire to find something to boast about,

Just remember that you have unique gifts and abilities.

Use them to God's glory and humbly do your best in the other areas.

God resists the proud,

But gives grace to the humble.

In Case You Are Free

One thing we have enjoyed doing this season
is planning a Christmas Eve service at our church.
I learned a little bit of PowerPoint to prepare the carols.
We are decorating tonight with fresh greenery and LED candles galore.
Hopefully, there will even be some crockpot potpourri with a pleasant Christmas smell.

It will be a simple service,
no fancy choirs,
no orchestras,
but there will be Scripture readings,
lots of familiar carols,
and a Bible message.

While most of my readers are in the Eastern time zone,
if you are still up at 7 Pacific (10 Eastern),
you could join us for our service.
It would be a pleasant background for your last minute wrapping or cooking.
It would be a way to prepare your heart for Christmas morning if you have not already had a service
and you are not in great need of sleep.
One of my favorite preachers will be bringing the message
and some of my Sunday School students will sing and play duets.

And here's the link. 

Timing is Everything

 This post has been in my mind since Thanksgiving,
but I can finally sit, breathe, and actually write it ...
and give it a Christmas twist.

Timing is everything,
especially if it is God's timing.

But when the fulness of the time was come,
God sent forth his Son,
made of a woman,
made under the law,
Galatians 4:4

The birth of Jesus seems anything but perfect.
Poverty, stables, shepherds, death plots.
But God knew what He was doing.
He sent His Son at the perfect time.

A year and a half ago,

we uprooted and crossed the country 
knowing that it was what God would have us to do.
But just because we knew it was God's plan did not mean that it was without struggle.

It came with human struggle.
We missed friends in NC.
We were far from our family in the east.
We were "useful" for 6 months of the year
and seemed to wander for the other 6 months.
We were in a liberal state during riots and protests.

The struggle was human.
Because God had told us to go
we should have let His peace reign.
He provided a home,
in a pleasant neighborhood close to town,
with a job not 10 minutes from home,
with "flexible" hours,
and He had made it all happen.

But He, in His grace, chose to show us His perfect timing this fall.
He moved us at the perfect time.
In October, we found out that this was the time we were needed.
Our family in Oregon was now in need of care,
not just a little care, but possibly end of life care.
Cancer and heart disease had struck and hit hard.

God moved us before Covid.
He got us settled before we were thrust into a new world of medical appointments.
There were no months of warning,
there was no time to prepare for a move,
there was no time to quarantine when we were immediately needed.
God knew that.
God set it up.
He could see what we could not.

And now you know where I have been,
and you will excuse any long absence.
For a little while at least, the medical appointments have slowed down.
We are enjoying a simplified Christmas season - 
one that had to cut a lot of the pleasant, but "fluff," elements of the celebration
in favor of our most focused Christmas ever (I think.)
I have enjoyed writing 3 verses of the Christmas story or Christmas prophecy each morning and really dwelling on small pieces instead of the whole story.
I have been more thankful for God (and His timing)
and am, at least for now, remembering to trust His way as best.