The Undesired and Unappreciated Gift



You have watched it, haven’t you - a child tearing through a stack of presents at a birthday or at Christmas?  One present opened, laid aside, another opened, laid aside, until they are all opened.  Then the child returns to the “most entertaining” or “most desired” for the remainder of the day or worse yet, begins complaining about what was not received or whining for the gift that another child received.  No thought for the efforts of Grandma in knitting the sweater.  No thought for the sacrifice of mom and dad to get the sneakers that were desperately needed.  Unacknowledged and undesired gifts.  The selfish soul does not see needs, only wants and desires and entertainment.

I am working very hard not to be that child.  Does that seem strange to you?  I have received a gift that I did not ask for or desire.  To me, at the present, it can’t compare to the gifts that others receive.  Yet, it is the gift that was chosen for me.  It was given to me by a wise and loving Heavenly Father who sees all.

 James 1:17

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above.

Matthew 7:11

If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts

unto your children, how much more shall your Father

which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?

 It is SO easy to ask why.  Psalm 127:3 “Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.”  If children are a reward, why can’t I have that reward?  Am I missing something?  What am I doing wrong?  Why so many teen mothers with unwanted pregnancies?  Why some families with seemingly more children than they can handle?  Why do drug addicts get the gift that I want?  Why can some women seem to have a child every two years like clock work?

 And so here is my struggle as I watch the growing bellies pass me by, as the halls of my home echo with silence.

The answer for me does not lie in medical intervention.  For now, it does not lie in adoption or fostering.  The answer is to appreciate the gift that God is giving me today.  I have failed to recognize the sweet fellowship of leaning on the everlasting arms when the days are too quiet and the emotional pain is stonger than any physical pain could be.  I have failed to acknowledge the freedom I have to be involved in a multitude of ministries all at the same time.  I have failed to accept the spiritual growth in my life from hours of Bible study beyond a “quick read” in the morning.  I have failed to value what it is to fast and pray when many Christians fail to ever see the need.  I have failed to acknowledge God’s special dealings with me.

 Are you struggling with a situation in your life?  A sickness, a disability, a financial crisis, singleness, barrenness, loss, …?  Do you need to, like me, look for the “gift” that God is trying to give you?

I am far from where I want to be in my acceptance, but I am learning and growing.